Buzzwordy: You Should Be Happy To Have Your CEO Back!

Buzzwordy: You Should Be Happy To Have Your CEO Back!: "Image by jurvetson via Flickr Day Fifty Nine, Asaf did a stellar job on introducing his company - he was meticulous in every way and Buzz..."

You Should Be Happy To Have Your CEO Back!

Image by jurvetson via Flickr

Day Fifty Nine,

Asaf did a stellar job on introducing his company - he was meticulous in every way and Buzzwordy was deeply impressed.

"Excuse me Asaf, will it be possible for me to get a tour of your company?  I would like to meet your designers, look at their work, and discuss with them on a few new design ideas." requested the marketing whiz kid.

"Sure Mr. Buzzwordy!  My plan is to have you do the facility tour tomorrow.  I want to focus on the ZupEXT(TM) IP discussions today if you don't mind." responded Asaf.

"Thanks Asaf.  This will be fine." nodded Buzzwordy.

Since neither Bif nor Xavia had ever discussed the ZupEXT IP with him, he was unsure how to aggressively drive the discussions with Asaf.  He knew that he had to be shrewd, harsh, and persistent when negotiating with anyone from this part of the world.  What was missing was his lack of depth regarding this mythical IP from Intelli!

"So Mr. Buzzwordy, are you ready to discuss the IP issue?" prodded Asaf while clearing his throat.

"Absolutely!" concurred the marketing whiz kid.

"Very well, I would like to direct your attention to several important areas.  If you and I can successfully resolve our differences in these areas before you leave for the U.S., I will consider your visit a big success.  Do you agree with my assessment?" stated Asaf.

"Absolutely!" nodded Buzzwordy.

"These areas are - licensing cost and royalty payment, usage right, and support cost.  I trust that you have the same topics on your mind as well.  Do we share the same understanding Mr. Buzzwordy?" asked Asaf.

"Absolutely!" acknowledged Buzzwordy.

Asaf gave Buzzwordy an interesting look, grinned subtly, and leaned his entire body over the cherry wood table.

"Mr. Buzzwordy, what about the upfront payment, derivative right, and cross-licensing arrangement?" inquired Asaf somewhat sarcastically.

"Absolutely, whatever you would like to discuss will be fine with me!" replied the marketing whiz kid.

"Really, so lets get started Mr. Buzzwordy!" nodded Asaf with an approving smile.

Buzzwordy knew that Asaf was setting him up to fail.  The lanky man would continue to throw in micro and peripheral topics as he nibbles away during the negotiation.  He just had to improvise so that he could get an upper hand on the situation.

"When Bif and I discussed a while back, he agreed to an upfront payment of US$2M upon the receipt of the first set of design documents.  I am sure that your engineers already have the opportunity to review all the design files concerning our ZupEXT IP, right?" asked Asaf.

"Well, be honest with you Asaf, I'm not aware of who the design lead is inside my company, do you have a name?" replied Buzzwordy.

"Mr. Buzzwordy, I don't think this is relevant.  I deal with your CEO so why do I care who his under link is!" challenged the lanky man.

Asaf's reply was poignantly intelligent and rendered Buzzwordy speechless for a while.  He felt his heart started to throb faster and faster, and he began to conjure up images of him dashing through the gates inside of the Toronto International Airport Terminal.

Suddenly, Buzzwordy remembered that Bif just had a stroke and this would be his alibi for everything that he didn't know.

"Are you still with me Mr. Buzzwordy?" asked Asaf.

"Yes Asaf, I forgot to mention to you that Bif is in a coma at this moment.  He had a stroke!" responded the marketing whiz kid.

"I am aware of his condition.  Anyway, he sounded just fine when I spoke to him earlier this morning." informed the lanky man.

"He recovered?" questioned the unsettling Buzzwordy.

"Confirmed!  You should be happy to have your CEO back." grinned Asaf.

The images of him dashing around in circles and chanting "The Last Dashing Hope" began to play tricks in his cranium.


I will be back on Day Sixty.

Buzzwordy

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Buzzwordy: Welcome to Intelli!

Buzzwordy: Welcome to Intelli!: "Day Fifty Eight, Buzzwordy was immediately ushered into a small and densely packed conference room after he checked in at the lobby of the ..."

Welcome to Intelli!

Day Fifty Eight,

Buzzwordy was immediately ushered into a small and densely packed conference room after he checked in at the lobby of the IP design house.  Balfour found his giggles unbearable throughout the entire ride and he retaliated by driving recklessly through the streets of Tel Aviv.

Something just dawned on Buzzwordy all of a sudden and he went into a complete trance.

"Wait a minute, I just remember that the driver should be named Shimir and not Balfour.  I need to ask these folks here for clarification." muttered Buzzwordy.

He took a panoramic view of the posters and pictures on the wall.  They were nothing spectacular, just a whole bunch of plain looking characters in different shades of outfit.  The marketing whiz kid was getting a little dizzy from staring at all these wall hanging items.

"Interesting, I don't see anything on the company's IP or technologies!" chuckled Buzzwordy.

"Very well and much of a great morning to you Mr. Buzzwordy.  Welcome to my company." smiled a lanky man in his early 30's.

"Oh hello to you as well.  I believe you are Anah.  Great to meet you in person!" grinned Buzzwordy while shaking the lanky man's right hand.

"Please oh please, there is no need for an apology.  My name is Asaf, not Anah.  In case that you don't know, he is my twin brother!" explained the lanky man.

"This is great.  Will your twin brother be joining us this morning?" probed Buzzwordy.

"It depends on how our meeting will turn out!" laughed Asaf.

After a short exchange of pleasantry, Asaf''s demeanor became solemnly serious.  He directed Buzzwordy to a computer screen where the marketing whiz kid readily came to realize the purpose of his visit.

Here is the screen capture of their meeting agenda,

Welcome to Intelli

Today's Meeting with Mr. Buzzwordy (Mr. Bif's Representative)

Agenda:

• Company Introduction
• IP Portfolio Introduction
• ZupEXT IP Review and Discussions (need two days to finalize)

Note: lunch, snack and dinner will be served today and tomorrow.

Buzzwordy scratched his hair a bit, rubbed his nose, and raised his chin up so that his eye level was almost the same as Asaf's.

"Do you have any question Mr. Buzzwordy?" asked the lanky man.

"I believe so Asaf, may I just call you Asaf?" questioned Buzzwordy.

"Sure please do so!" confirmed the lanky man.

"Thank you.  Do you happen to have a driver in your company named Shimir or does he go by Balfour sometimes?" asked Buzzwordy.

Asaf closed his eyes upon hearing Buzzwordy's question.  It was obvious that something was bugging him and he was fighting hard to ward off the negative element.  The vein on his forehead was getting quite large and this abnormal engorgement made Asaf look like a human unicorn.

"Mr. Buzzwordy, do you really want to know?" asked Asaf in a tiny voice.

"Asaf, I don't think this is so important.  If you are OK with it, we can just move on with the agenda!" suggested Buzzwordy.

"So you don't want to know?" inquired the lanky man.

Buzzwordy shrugged his shoulder gently and gave Asaf a nonchalant look.  He then opened up his arms, nodded his head, and cleared his throat.

"Asaf, in the interest of time, lets start the agenda!" insisted Buzzwordy.



See you all on Day Fifty Nine.


Buzzwordy

Buzzwordy: His Name Is Katan!

Buzzwordy: His Name Is Katan!: "Image by Emma Paperclip via Flickr Day Fifty Seven, Akim removed his eye patch, set it gently on the dining table, and re..."

His Name Is Katan!

Image by Emma Paperclip via Flickr

Day Fifty Seven,

Akim removed his eye patch, set it gently on the dining table, and reached his hand out to Buzzwordy. 

In sheer embarrassment, the marketing whiz kid found himself fumbling to stand up.  He threw his left hand into the air uncontrollably and before he knew it, Akim got a hold of his hand and pulled him straight up from the floor.

"Did I scare you sir?" asked the caring Akim.

Buzzwordy grunted incessantly and purposely avoid to make any eye contact with Akim.  He felt like a jerk for making a big scene out of Akim's decorative eye patch.

"The damage has been done!" uttered Buzzwordy to himself.

"I'm sorry sir, did I scare you when I removed the eye patch?" inquired the concerned Akim.

"Well, actually, well, ...." responded the nervous Buzzwordy.

"Never mind sir, I just want to let you know that I lost my eye from a car bombing incident many years ago.  I survived and became a better person after all!" sighed Akim with a shrug.

"Thank you Akim.  You certainly have my deepest sympathy, but why did you keep a worm inside your eye socket?" inquired the confused Buzzwordy.

Akim pulled the little worm out of his eye socket, patted it gently, and sat it down on the dining table.

The marketing whiz kid kept staring at each and every move of the worm, and trying hard to determine if it was crawling towards the center or the end of the table.  He was captivated by how nimble the little creature was.

"His name is Katan, it means small in Hebrew." intercepted Akim.

Buzzwordy reached out his index finger to poke Katan on his stomach.  He wasn't sure if his encounter with this little worm was some kind of a karma but he felt really intrigued by Akim's little friend.

"Excuse me sir, I think it is time to put Katan back to where he belongs.  I have customers waiting!" whispered Akim to Buzzwordy.

Buzzwordy nodded while Akim picked Katan up and shoved him back into his eye socket.  The whole process was so smooth and before the marketing whiz kid was able to come to sense with his surrounding, Akim had already put his eye patch back and sauntered to the front of the restaurant to greet other customers.

"Gee, I forgot to ask him if Katan will grow any longer and what does he eat normally!" said Buzzwordy while shaking his head.

The marketing whiz kid never got his answer.  Nonetheless, he found this episode during breakfast enchanting and mesmerizing, and he knew that despite how lousy the day would unfold with Balfour, the Akim-Katan story could very easily make his day.

"Get in, they are waiting for you!" shouted Balfour as he pulled his car up to the curb outside of the Dan Tel Aviv hotel.

Without hesitation, Buzzwordy jumped right into the vehicle.

"Great day Balfour!  Great day indeed!" grinned Buzzwordy.

Balfour gave the marketing whiz kid the usual condescending look and popped his wheelie like a bat out of hell.

"Great day indeed Balfour!" giggled Buzzwordy.


I will be back on Day Fifty Eight.


Buzzwordy

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Look At This!

Image via Wikipedia

Day Fifty Six,

It was a relatively peaceful evening for Buzzwordy.  The news about Bif getting a stroke had somewhat calmed him down considerably.  He stood next to a window in his hotel room, sipped his Gold Star beer (a famous Israeli beer), and stared at the night view in Tel Aviv.

This perceived Death March could very well turn out to be a kickback trip for him after all.  With Bif no longer at the helm of his company, things could improve significantly.  Buzzwordy thought about Xavia being promoted to take over Bif's position or this board member named Sokol could easily be the candidate since he knew the company inside and out.  On the other hand, the board might recruit someone from the outside and really injected some raw talents into the company.

"Wait a second, what if Bif returns suddenly and surprises everyone?" asked the marketing whiz kid to himself.

A little voice inside of him kept saying NO.

"It is not possible!  It is just darn impossible for Bif to recover so quickly!  He has stroke MAN!" murmured Buzzwordy emphatically.

As he continued to raise questions to himself, he realized that he was simply trying to kill his time.  He felt a tremendous relief and his back was no longer killing him.  Buzzwordy could picture just how different the office would be without Bif being around.

"Wow, it will just be a great place to work, won't it?" clapped Buzzwordy excitedly.


Before he could remember what was pacing through his head, Buzzwordy plunged deep into the hotel bed and fell asleep like a new born child.

"Good morning sir, will it be just yourself for breakfast?  My name is Akim. " greeted a middle-aged man with a decorative eye patch.

Buzzwordy soon realized that he was standing at the entrance of a modestly looking restaurant.  The middle-aged man looked sort of out of place - it could very well be the decorative eye patch on his face that set him apart from all the other people in the area.

"Good morning to you as well Akim.  Yes, it will just be me.  By the way, what time do you have right now?" responded Buzzwordy.

"Please follow me.  The local time is 6:15 in the morning." nodded the middle-aged man as he gestured the marketing whiz kid to follow him into the restaurant.

There was something about Akim's eye patch that intrigued Buzzwordy.  He kept staring at it without blinking and his behavior was quickly spotted by the middle-aged man.

"Excuse me sir, are you gazing at my eye patch?  Do you know what is behind it?" asked Akim.

Buzzwordy was caught completely off-guard by Akim's questions.  He wasn't sure how to answer him but was quite certain that the middle-aged man was onto something.  Something unexpected... something strange!

"Look at this!" smiled Akim as he removed his eye patch right in front of Buzzwordy.


"What the heck!' screamed the marketing whiz kid while falling out of his chair.


I will be back on Day Fifty Seven.


Buzzwordy

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Cranium Booster: Who Knows? Just Follow My Order!

Cranium Booster: Who Knows? Just Follow My Order!: "Image by otzberg via Flickr Day Fifty Five, Balfour was quite bent out of shape by Buzzwordy's nonchalant behavior. He felt li..."

Who Knows? Just Follow My Order!

Image by otzberg via Flickr

Day Fifty Five,

Balfour was quite bent out of shape by Buzzwordy's nonchalant behavior.  He felt like his intelligence was brutally attacked by this geeky foreigner.

"So what is your explanation?" asked Balfour.

"The answer is very simple Balfour!  The giant didn't even know what was inside of each bag and all three robbers were too dumb or lazy to open up their bags.  In other words, it was purely a guessing game and all the robbers fell for it." explained Buzzwordy.

"Furthermore, the third robber didn't have to react so immaturely because he could have gotten gold or silver in the bag.  Have I made myself clear Balfour?" said Buzzwordy while clearing his throat.

"Your explanation makes no sense to me.  The bag with the key inside has the lightest weight and the third robber felt it the moment he was told by the giant that there wasn't any copper inside.  Right?" shouted Balfour.

"Ah Balfour, here is where you miss the crux of the entire story.  First of all, you were never told how heavy the key was.  It could weigh the same as gold or silver.  Second of all, no one knew what was concealed inside of each bag.  As I said before, it is just a guessing game!" smiled the marketing whiz kid.

Once again, the air between Balfour and Buzzwordy has gotten thick and the two deliberately ignored each other.  Buzzwordy felt like he has completely crushed Balfour and rendered his intelligence useless.  All these unnecessary insults from Balfour were thrown out of the window once and for all.  Why?  This was how Buzzwordy felt, that's why?

"Here we are, the Dan Tel Aviv hotel!" announced Balfour, the upset driver.

Buzzwordy gave him a thumb up, grabbed his bags, and got into the I-Am-Ready to dash position.

"Oh by the way, what time are you picking me up tomorrow morning?" asked Buzzwordy as he tilted his head backwards.

"7AM out here!" shouted the burly driver.

"Perfect, may the evening finds you well!" replied the marketing whiz kid sarcastically.

Buzzwordy walked in broad strides as he headed towards the hotel registration desk.  His chin was lifted high above its normal position, and he leisurely whistled his favorite tune which no one could identify.

"Good evening sir, may I have your name?" greeted a pleasant hotel receptionist with a high pitch voice.

"Buzzwordy.  Yes, it will be B for boy and U for UFO, ..." answered the marketing whiz kid.

"Yes Mr. Buzzwordy.  I have you down as our guest for the next 3 days, right?  Wait, you have a message from a gentleman named Xavia!  He said that he is your boss." said the receptionist.

Buzzwordy thanked the receptionist, grabbed an envelope from her, and opened it to find a hand written note inside.

"Buzzwordy, something happened to Bif.  Call me now!" read Buzzwordy.

The marketing whiz kid took a deep breath, rubbed his eyebrow a bit, and reached for his smartphone.

"Hello.. hello...  Xavia, this is Buzzwordy calling from Tel Aviv.  Am I speaking to a real voice?  I guess I am!  Just got your note about Bif.  What happened?" inquired Buzzwordy.

There was a long silence on the other end of the line.  Buzzwordy found Xavia struggling to speak - he knew that something bad had happened to Bif.

"Xavia, what's going on with Bif?" asked Buzzwordy the second time.

"Listen up Buzzwordy, Bif had a stroke this morning and he is in a coma right now.  My advice to you is to have your meeting in Tel Aviv and come back home once you are done with the negotiation.  Got it?" suggested Xavia.

"What is going to happen to us Xavia?  I mean what is going to happen to our company?" interrogated Buzzwordy.

"Who knows?  Just follow my order!" commented Xavia before hanging up the phone.

Buzzwordy shook his head a bit.  He was neither happy nor sad after learning what happened to Bif.  All he knew was that things could be really different back in the office upon his return.  he kept asking himself who would be Bif's replacement.

"Umm what a blunderbuzz!" smirked Buzzwordy.


I will be back on Day Fifty Six.


Buzzwordy       

 

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Cranium Booster: Let Me Explain!

Cranium Booster: Let Me Explain!: "Image by tarale via Flickr Day Fifty Four, Balfour and Buzzwordy must have been riding in the tiny Datsun for almost two hours withou..."

Let Me Explain!

Image by tarale via Flickr

Day Fifty Four,


Balfour and Buzzwordy must have been riding in the tiny Datsun for almost two hours without speaking to each other since leaving the Tel Aviv Ben Gurion International Airport.  The climate outside of the car felt smoldering hot and both of them were sweating profusely.  Buzzwordy found himself trapped within a small space, thirsty, dejected, and unable to communicate with the burly giant next to him.

He kept staring outside of the window with the hope of spotting interesting objects.  Images were seen to fly by like shooting stars in the dark - they came and disappeared into the thin air.  Zippo and they were gone!

"Hey, we have another hour to go.  You should try to relax, OK!" suggested Balfour.

"So when will we get to the hotel?" asked Buzzwordy.

"Ah, the Dan Tel Aviv hotel!" exuded the heavyset driver.

"So what time Balfour?" insisted the marketing whiz kid.

"Listen Mr. Buzzwordy, just look at your watch!" retorted the impatient Balfour.

"Balfour, my watch has a different time!  Why is it so hard for you to tell me the local time?" complained Buzzwordy.

Buzzwordy's reaction must have royally offended Balfour.  He began to cuss and curse loudly while giving the marketing whiz kid demeaning stares.  Something must be done quickly to contain the hostile situation before Buzzwordy gets thrown out of the tiny Datsun.

The central processing unit within Buzzwordy's head began to crank and shift into high gears.  A few really exciting cranium busting challenges could very well be brought up to Balfour and see him getting crushed and humiliated right in front of the marketing whiz kid.  A sense of satisfaction quickly overpowered Buzzwordy and propelled him into the world of temporary nirvana.

"Balfour, since we still have another hour to go, would you like to play some mental games with me?" asked Buzzwordy innocently.

"What game?" smirked Balfour.

"Lets try this one first Balfour!  Once upon a time, there lived a giant in the forest with three bags.  The first bag contained gold, the second bag contained silver, and the third bag contained the key to wisdom.  Are you interested to play this game?" inquired Buzzwordy.

"Sure but I can tell you that this game is a loser.  Why?  Simply because there is no key out there that can give you wisdom!" scorned Balfour.

"One day the giant fell asleep under a huge oak tree.  When he woke up, he found himself being surrounded by three robbers.  There was a bag in each robber's hand." described Buzzwordy.

"Go on!" encouraged Balfour.

"The giant looked disturbed and wasn't sure what to do next.  The first robber asked him what was inside the bag that he was holding onto, and the giant told him that it was gold.  The first robber was delighted to hear the answer and quickly ran away.  The second robber asked him what was concealed inside the bag that he was holding onto, and the giant told him that it was silver.  Just like the first robber, he was equally excited and promptly disappeared." told Buzzwordy.

"Keep going!" demanded Balfour.

"Instead of asking the question, the third robber waved the bag in front of the giant and told him that copper was inside the bag.  The giant shook his head and informed the third robber that the bag contained the key to wisdom.  Upon hearing this news, the third robber went berserk, threw the bag onto the ground, and screamed at the giant." continued Buzzwordy in a calm tone of voice.

"Keep going!" urged Balfour.

"[You should have never told me the truth.  I'm sick and tired of looking for my fortune and who the heck needs a key to wisdom.  You can't find wisdom in the forest!] screamed the third robber before he ran deep into the forest.  The giant shook his head and told himself that these robbers were the three dumbest ones out there!" said Buzzwordy.

"You lost me, why are they dumb?" asked the confused Balfour.

Buzzwordy knew that his plan was working because the burly giant didn't have the wit to understand the story.  He turned and looked at Balfour with a big grin on his face.

"Let me explain!" grinned Buzzwordy.


I'll be back on Day Fifty Five.


Buzzwordy

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Cranium Booster: What Is His Name?

Cranium Booster: What Is His Name?: "Image by Christyn via Flickr Day Fifty Three, 'Hello officer, I really hope that my DEATH MARCH reply didn't rub you the wrong way.&nbs..."

What Is His Name?

Image by Christyn via Flickr

Day Fifty Three,

"Hello officer, I really hope that my DEATH MARCH reply didn't rub you the wrong way.  What I really mean is that I've been forced to take on an assignment that is known to fail even before starting it.  As people say, the odd is not in my favor at all!" sighed Buzzwordy.

"Go on!" signaled the officer.

Buzzwordy began to unload his life story on this poor officer.  He mentioned about Madam Fei in China and how his boss Bif used him as his pawn.  His hard work never got recognized and even if they did, there would always be other tougher assignments for him to take on.  The portrayal of his marketing journey was vivid and animated, and he could see the officer warming up to his story slowly but steadfastly.

"I see Mr. Buzzwordy!  So life has been hell for you, right?" probed the officer.

"100%!" replied the marketing whiz kid without any hesitation.

The skeptical officer gave Buzzwordy a long and hard stare, scratched his neck a bit, sipped his black coffee, and leaned forward with a "I HEARD YOU SUCKER" nod.

"Alright Mr. Buzzwordy!  Do you have someone to pick you up outside the airport?" asked the officer.

"Oh yes, the IP design company called Intelli is supposed to send a driver to pick me up outside the airport." answered Buzzwordy in a somewhat relaxed manner.

"What is his name?" inquired the officer.

Buzzwordy fumbled through his laptop bag and found a piece of paper - all wrinkled up and looked pretty ragged. 

"Got it, his name is Balfour! responded Buzzwordy.

"Balfour, what a wonderful name for a local boy!" nodded the officer as he proceeded to stamp Buzzwordy's passport.

Buzzwordy thanked the officer profusely and picked up his speed as he headed towards the airport ground transportation area.

"Holy blunderbuzz, I'm really late for Balfour.  I just hope that he doesn't mind waiting for me!" grunted Buzzwordy.

The moment Buzzwordy entered into the ground transportation area, he saw a huge guy carrying a sign with his name on it.  The look on his face would humiliate anyone at first glance.

"Man, Balfour looks like a towering inferno.  Sh..!" murmured the marketing whiz kid.

"Good afternoon, you must be Balfour from Intelli.  It is great to meet you and sorry for being late.  I got held up at ....!" greeted Buzzwordy with a broad smile.

"Mr. Buzzwordy.  You are late.  Follow me to my car now." gestured Balfour emotionlessly.

There was no "HELLO" or "WELCOME TO TEL AVIV" greeting whatsoever.  Balfour kept pacing forward with Buzzwordy sprinting after him closely.

"Hey Balfour, how long is the ride to the hotel?" questioned Buzzwordy once they arrived at Balfour's car.

"Get in!" growled the annoyed driver.

Poor Buzzwordy shook his head and whispered to himself that it will be a long road ahead with Balfour behind the wheel.  He let out a loud yawn and stretched his entire body out like a bat.

Balfour gave him a condescending stare, twitched his facial muscle, and drove off like there is no tomorrow.

See you all on Day Fifty Four.

Buzzwordy

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Cranium Booster: Death March Mr. Buzzwordy!

Cranium Booster: Death March Mr. Buzzwordy!: " &n..."

Death March Mr. Buzzwordy!

                                             View of Tel Aviv

Image via Wikipedia

Day Fifty Two,

"Excuse me sir, we have landed in Tel Aviv and it is time to disembark the plane!" smiled a chubby air stewardess as she was shaking Buzzwordy's arm persistently.

"Oh...  What!  Do you know what happened to the two kids who sat next to me?" yawned Buzzwordy.

The chubby air stewardess shook her head and walked away gently.

Buzzwordy managed to grab his luggage in the overhead compartment, throw the laptop bag over his shoulder, and stagger towards the front exit of the plane.

"What uh great nap that was!" exclaimed the marketing whiz kid.

As he was sauntering towards the immigration area, he noticed an indescribable tenseness in the air.  The airport wasn't exactly modern, however, it possessed all the needed amenities for any traveler.

"I wonder what is the deal with all these soldiers inside the terminal.  Maximum security to welcome Buzzwordy's arrival.  What a treat!" giggled Buzzwordy incessantly.

The foreign visitor line inside the immigration area wasn't too long, but it didn't seem to move much at all.  Buzzwordy saw armed soldiers strolling up and down the place, their bodies were rigid like dead corpses, and their faces radiated no warmth whatsoever.  Everyone in the line was pretty well behaved with the exception of infrequent complaints from a few old ladies.  Sadly, no one paid attention, not even the stone cold soldiers.

This long wait must have seemed like an eternity to Buzzwordy - he started to feel numbness in his hip and his throat was getting really itchy.  He kept telling himself to tough things out even though he knew about the purpose of his visit - a bloody death march at its finest moment.

"Next!" shouted an immigration officer from behind a glass like but fully enclosed kiosk.

Buzzwordy wasted no time at all by lunging his body right in front of the immigration officer.  He let out a broad grin while handing his passport over to the officer.

"So Mr. Buzzwordy, is this your first time to Israel?" asked the deadbeat officer.

"Yes and I can't wait to fully check out Tel Aviv." replied Buzzwordy in an upbeat voice.

"What is your purpose for coming to Israel?" probed the officer.

"My CEO will call this trip a turning point for his career but it is really a death march as far as I could tell!" answered Buzzwordy in a sarcastic tone.

"Death march Mr. Buzzwordy?  Please explain very carefully." inquired the curious officer while raising his voice.

Suddenly, Buzzwordy felt the air has gone from tense to code red and he better cool it down quickly before he gets carted away by the soldiers.

"Death march Mr. Buzzwordy?" asked the impatient officer.

"Are you ready for my remedial explanation my dear officer?" grinned the marketing whiz kid.


Lets see if Buzzwordy can come up with a snappy solution to get himself out of this bind.


See everyone on Day Fifty Three.


Buzzwordy

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Cranium Booster: Lets See the Money First!

Cranium Booster: Lets See the Money First!: " &n..."

Lets See the Money First!

                               Semantic Web in Rubik's Cube

Image by dullhunk via Flickr

Day Fifty One,


Buzzwordy found himself sitting between two teenage kids on the plane bounded for Tel Aviv.  These kids never stopped talking to each other and before he knew it, his patience was just about to run out.

"Hey dudes, can I get you guys to stop talking for the next few hours so that I can get some sleep?  You don't want to be around when I am unhappy!" threatened Buzzwordy.


"Mister, have a life and leave us alone.  If you are a frequent traveler, you should have no problems sleeping anyway." jeered the kid with straight brown hair who found pleasure in sticking his foot out into the middle of the aisle. 

"Yeah, Kurt is right!  Mind your own business mister!" echoed the other kid on Buzzwordy's right.

Buzzwordy gave both defiant kids a cold stare, rubbed his eyes violently, scratched his neck rapidly, and began to recite a poem which he made up when he first became a marketing wannabe.

"Samples can be good, and goodies can be sampled.  Products can be labeled, and labels can be products.  Look who is on my left and who is on my right, and they both make me really uptight."

He then paused for a second and checked the reaction of his neighbors.  Surprisingly, these kids were so busy with themselves and they completely ignored his poem.

"Hey you, do you want to solve a business problem?  If you win,  I will give you $20.  However, if I win, you and your friend will have to shut your mouths for the rest of this trip.  Are you interested or not?" challenged Buzzwordy.

Both kids looked a bit puzzled since neither of them anticipated this move from Buzzwordy.  They looked at each other and the kid in the aisle seat darted his tongue out mischievously.

"Lets see the money first!" winced the kid on his left.

Buzzwordy flashed his $20 bill and waved it in front of the kid.  He stared at it without blinking his eyes while his friend expressed his excitement by resting his hand atop Buzzwordy's shoulder.

"Look kid, just because you have been invited to this marketing quiz game, it doesn't mean that we are now friends.  Are you clear on this?" said Buzzwordy in a harsh voice.

"OK mister!  What is your question?" replied the kid in the window seat.

"Yeah, what is your question?" the kid in the aisle seat chimed in immediately.

Buzzwordy raised his arms high above his shoulder, let out a heavy sigh, and got himself into a ready position.

"How relevant is vision marketing in the context of on-line semantic-based community networks?" asked the marketing whiz kid.

"What the heck?" yelled both kids simultaneously.

"Shall I repeat my question?" grinned Buzzwordy.

"I have never heard of these terms before and by the way, you can't throw us a fast ball like this.  I have to say your question is completely out of context mister." complained the kid in the window seat.

"Kammie is right!" nodded the kid in the aisle seat.

"So Kammie and Kevin, I'm under the impression that you two want a simple question instead.  Is it correct?" chuckled Buzzwordy.

"Totally!" shouted both kids.

"In this case, lets make a deal.  Let me rest a bit first before we resume with a much simpler question.  What say you two?" suggested Buzzwordy.

"Alright!" concurred both kids.

"Excellent!" smiled the marketing whiz kid as he closed his eyes and began to slumber.


See you all on Day Fifty Two.


Buzzwordy

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Cranium Booster: Keep the Seeing Dog in the Front!

Cranium Booster: Keep the Seeing Dog in the Front!: "The Toronto Pearson International Airport is a great place for a quick dash Image by archer10 (Dennis) via Flickr Day Fifty, Buzzwordy..."

Keep the Seeing Dog in the Front!

The Toronto Pearson International Airport is a great place for a quick dash

Image by archer10 (Dennis) via Flickr

Day Fifty,

Buzzwordy found himself kneeling next to a washroom sink inside the Toronto airport terminal.  Cold water was running down his face and his eyes were kinda halfway shut.

"I just don't believe this!  For such a large terminal, especially an international terminal, there is no one in this washroom.  How odd!" laughed Buzzwordy hysterically.

"Just one more leg to go and I will be in Tel Aviv.  Hell, this is a death march at its finest moment!" screamed the marketing whiz kid as he began to stand up.

On a count to three, Buzzwordy took off from the washroom like a roadrunner being pursued by a group of insatiable hunters.  He took a quick peek at the departure screen, found his gate information, and resumed his quick dash towards the destination.

"Keep the seeing dog in the front.  Keep the seeing dog in the front.  Keep the seeing ......" recited Buzzwordy repeatedly as he ran towards his gate.

While dashing frantically, Buzzwordy felt the passing images moving at the speed of light and everyone seemed so small and insignificant.  Without a reason, he suddenly found himself being the only lonely soul on the move.

"Keep the seeing dog in the front.  Keep the seeing ......" he started to recite the same line again.

Gate 33 finally appeared in front of him, and he was literally taken aback when confronted by a long line of people waiting to get on the plane.

"Holy shataun (an often used word by Buzzwordy when he is either amazed or upset)!" exclaimed Buzzwordy.

For no purposeful reason, he started to chant again, "Keep the seeing dog in the front.  Keep the seeing dog in the front.  Keep the seeing ......".

His nervousness must have caught the attention of an airport security officer.  Before Buzzwordy could get himself into the back of the line, he was being asked by the officer to present his picture ID and boarding pass.

"Why are you so nervous sir?  What is bothering you?" asked the stern officer.

Buzzwordy looked restless and jumpy, and he couldn't put words together to keep the officer off his back.  Without blurting a single word, he shoved his picture ID right in the officer's face.

"Who is this guy in the picture?" inquired the curious officer.

"Me.  It is me before stress begins to eat my body up!" replied the distraught Buzzwordy.

The security officer did not find Buzzwordy's answer funny at all.  He took another look at the picture ID and signaled Buzzwordy to stay put while he got on his walkie-talkie.

"Hello sir, look at you.  Were you looking for us?  My family is right over there!" smiled the same old man whom Buzzwordy met on the plane as he approached the perspiring marketing whiz kid.

"Oh hi.  How are you doing?" grinned the reluctant Buzzwordy.

"Are you kidding me?  Is this you Bosley, my favorite airport security guard?  Why are you giving my friend a hard time?  He needs to get on the plane with me now." said the old man while expressing displeasure to the security officer.

"Hey, it is good to see you my old friend.  Hope all is well with you and your family.  So you know this strange fellow?" asked the security officer in a somewhat more relaxed manner.

"Oh yes.  I know him well and he is a good guy.  So can he go now?" asked the old man.

"Alright.  Just this time.  Hey, you Mr. Buzzwordy, watch yourself and for Pete's sake, stop jerking your body!" said the security officer while shaking his head.

Buzzwordy stood motionless and was totally unaware of what had just transpired around him.  His subconscious mind began to overtake his consciousness and urged him to start his chanting again.

"Lets go now.  They are doing the final boarding call.  Hurry!" urged the old man in a pushy voice.


Alas, Buzzwordy had finally made it onto the plane.


See you all on Day Fifty One.


Buzzwordy

Cranium Booster: Who is Stephan?

Cranium Booster: Who is Stephan?: "Hi Readers, With Sweat Block, Buzzwordy will never have to worry about dousing his face with cold water. If you want to stop persp..."

Who is Stephan?

Hi Readers,

With Sweat Block, Buzzwordy will never have to worry about dousing his face with cold water.  If you want to stop perspiring, use Sweat Block now....





Hey My Cyber Friends,

Please excuse my sudden departure, especially when the stories were just about to kick into a higher gear.

I'm back and have a lot more stories to share with all of you.  My three months of hiatus got me involved in another gig that gave me a lot more exciting stories to tell.  Oh my badness, I can hardly wait to start my script again.  

SO STAY TUNED FOLKS...  BUZZWORDY IS BACK! 







The view of Toronto from inside an aircraft is mesmerizing.  Enjoy!

Image by rmburnes via Flickr

Day Forty Nine,

"I'm very sorry to bother you sir - my family is very noisy.  I really hope that you don't mind.  Do you have kids?  As you can see, I have 5 wonderful children!" nodded an older gentleman who sat right behind Buzzwordy on the plane bounded for Toronto.

"It is quite alright!" responded the marketing whiz kid with a yawn.

"Is Toronto your final destination today?" inquired the older gentleman.

"No, I will need to go to Tel Aviv from Toronto!" replied Buzzwordy.

"Really!  What a coincidence?  My family and I are going there also!" grinned the older gentleman.


Buzzwordy turned his head around and gave the older guy a grin as well.  He then sank his body into the seat and closed his eyes.


"Hey Buzzwordy, do you remember me?  I'm Stephan from Ukraine.  Do you still remember the little Swiss knife that I gave to you during our first meeting in Hanoi?" winced Stephan while sticking his face right next to Buzzwordy's face.

"Sorry, I don't believe I know you.  What Swiss knife are you talking about?" replied Buzzwordy with a cold stare.

"You know what I'm talking about man!  I want my special Swiss knife back or else!" shouted Stephan as he began to squeeze Buzzwordy's arm. 


The pain became increasingly obvious and it started to inflict major discomfort on Buzzwordy.


"Hey knock it off!  On a count to three, if you don't stop squeezing my arm, I'm going to put so much pain in you.  You know I mean it!" shouted Buzzwordy hysterically.

It didn't look like Stephan was going to quit from squeezing Buzzwordy's arm.  Instead, he doubled up his force by placing two hands on the same arm and squeezing it with all his power.

At this time, Buzzwordy was screaming for help.  He found himself kicking and shouting, and sinking his teeth deep into his tongue.

"Oh no, I feel like I'm just about to bite my tongue off!" a little voice from within Buzzwordy told him so.

"Excuse me sir, I think you are having a really bad dream.  Are you feeling OK now?" Buzzwordy was awaken by the same older gentleman who sat behind him.

"Really?  Did you hear me scream?" asked the marketing whiz kid who was found drenched in sweat.

"Yes, I think everyone could hear you!  By the way, did you really piss off Stephan?" inquired the older man.


"Who is Stephan?" asked the sweaty Buzzwordy.


"He is from Ukraine!" replied the older man with a grin.


"What?" exclaimed Buzzwordy while shaking his head.


He now realizes that he has just waken up from a lousy dream that is a final outlet of a long-term pressure cooker life.


"You need to douse your face with cold water when the plane reaches Toronto Mr. Buzzwordy!" sighed the perplexed marketing whiz kid.

The moment the plane touched down on the runway in Toronto, Buzzwordy was so eager to jump off the aircraft to get his face immersed in a sink filled with cold water.


"Sir, please sit down and buckle up!  You cannot stand up until the aircraft has safely reached the gate!" shouted an air stewardess with an unusally looking mohawk haircut.


Buzzwordy gave her an icy cold stare before plunging into his seat again.


"Alright Buzzwordy, it is almost time for the cold water treatment.  Just hang in there you poor soul!" whispered Buzzwordy while feverishly tapping on his forehead with his left thumb.


Lets see how Buzzwordy manages to find his way to the terminal gate where the plane bounded for Tel Aviv will be waiting for him.


See you all on Day Fifty.


Buzzwordy

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